We met in college…
We were two measly little freshman with one thing in common–Living Legends. Both of our families had been members of Living Legends, and so as new freshman with nothing to lose, we both auditioned. We both made it and soon started seeing each other a lot. But it was no “love at first sight” deal. In fact, I thought Ruben hated me for the longest time. He was shy, but seemed more closed off towards me. We were acquaintances and nothing more for a long time our freshman year at Brigham Young University.
And then we went to Central America with Living Legends. Neither of us can pinpoint when it happened, but something sparked as we spent time performing and touring Central America and we began to develop “baby crushes” on each other. Three months after returning to Utah, Ruben left to serve a two-year mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Londrina, Brazil. I didn’t “wait” for him, but I did write him every now and then. Ruben looked forward to my far and few between letters over those two hot and humid years.
When Ruben got back from his mission, I cried. I was so excited! We talked a little bit his first day back, but not much. A few weeks before school started in the fall, Ruben texted me and we made plans to go to lunch. I was so nervous for that lunch. But seeing him was so normal. We talked and caught up on life and all the things that had happened and changed in those two years he was gone. It felt easier than it ever felt before. After that first time we saw each other, we both started making serious efforts to see each other from me visiting him (and his whole family) at his sisters house, to stopping by the booth we had for auditions to hang out, to inviting each other to go roller skating with some old friends.
I remember the first time I knew I really liked him was when he went out of town for a family reunion. We hadn’t even been on an official first date, but I woke up one morning missing him. Two days later, when he got back from his trip, he asked me on our first date. I almost died of excitement! And needless to say, I was a mess of nerves before our first date. I vividly remember laying on the floor of my bathroom and my roommate telling me it would be a great first date. It was!
What are you doing Thursday night…
He picked me up and we drove around for a while (he had no idea where he was going and we got a little lost). We ended at Rock Canyon Park. He had a picnic packed with sandwiches, bottled soda, and even cake. We ate dinner and talked for hours. We watched the sun set. It was pretty romantic. I remember as the night went on we kept getting closer and closer. At one point, we were pretty close to each other and I was talking and I noticed his hand getting closer to my face. I was freaking out because I thought he was about to kiss me, but I didn’t know if it was just in my head! So I looked at him and said, “What?” He backed off so fast and quickly changed the subject resulting in us leaving. I really thought I had made it up in my head that he was going to kiss me, but when we talked about it a few weeks later, I found out I was right; he was going to kiss me. And I freaked him out by asking, “What?” Needless to say, that’s one of my favorite stories of ours and we look back and laugh on it often.
From there, things just started to develop quickly. We haven’t gone a day without seeing each other since that first date (unless one of us was out of town–and by one of us I mean me because I’m always traveling). We spent hours after hanging out or studying in one of our cars just talking about life and things that are important to us.
So what are we…
There was one night that we had just spent hours studying in the library and I asked him to walk me home. It was a few weeks after our first date and we had just started holding hands. When he dropped me off, he ended up coming inside for a few minutes. At some point in our conversation, Ruben asked, “So what are we?” I didn’t really know or even know if he wanted to put a label on it or anything, so I started rambling about how I liked where we were and where we were going and how if he didn’t want to, we didn’t need to put a label on it and then BAM! He kissed me!! And then he quickly left because he was so dang nervous. I went to bed that night on cloud nine, but also a little confused because I had no idea if that sealed the deal or what. He went to bed on cloud nine knowing he had a girlfriend (We had to clear that up a couple days later, because obviously we were not on the same page).
I love you…
From there, it was constant hanging out. There were a lot of late night talks in the car, drives to the temple, football games, study sessions in the library, and everything in between. I remember the first night I knew that I loved him. We had just finished a serious conversation and it was a pretty vulnerable moment for us. I remember I looked at him and I just knew. I knew that I loved him and that even though he was not perfect (and neither am I), I loved him and never wanted there to be a day without him. The next day, we were in Salt Lake walking around. I was trying all night to not say I love, at fear that it was too soon and that I would send Ruben running for the hills. We were driving to dinner with his sister and some friends that night and he told me had something he needed to talk to me about. I was freaking out! Was it good? Was it bad? What was going on? We got to Chili’s before anybody else, and I told him I couldn’t wait any longer and he just needed to tell me. He looked at me and asked, “Is it too early to say I love you?” I was so elated! I told him I loved him too. And it felt so perfect to say. Little did I know, he had said I love you a few weeks earlier during one of our long talks in the car. He was afraid that I either didn’t hear him, or was so freaked out that I didn’t say anything! Luckily, I just didn’t hear him.